Eureka!

I think I've got the idea for the perfect alarm clock. Forget all those fancy affairs that wake you up in a 'natural' way, getting lighter and lighter and louder and louder, so you don't wake up suddenly, but almost like on your own.

Rubbish.

No, what you need is an alarm clock that will ask you really tough questions really early in the morning, such as:

"Where is my umbrella?"

or, alternatively:

"Where is dad's T pass? He called me from the station."

or else:

"Find the derivative of function F(x)=x^3+14x^2+45789x+87 without using any shortcuts."

Now, the trick to this is to ANSWER THE QUESTION. By the time you're done, your brain will not only be awake, but also full of your daily dose of the Guilt Endorphins, because you scrounged your father out of his daily free T ride, but at least your mother found her umbrella in your bag, and used the T pass to get to her own work.

Seriously. Otherwise I would never have gotten up at 7:40 this morning.

Hurrah!

Row that boat.

I really strongly dislike the summer, because I'm not very good with the whole 'heat and humidity' thing. I mean, I'm Russian. I won't lie and say I cope with the cold any better, but at least there you can bundle up. My ideal temperature is around 70, though probably less. Another reason? I hate summer clothes. Especially shorts. Shorts and I do not go well together. Unfortunately, we have to go together today, but we, neither of us, is liking it.

I just finished ironing. Yeah, for my mom. 'Cause it's really important, you understand, to iron underwear. Without that, it will not serve its purpose and hold things in place. Yes, I am scoffing. Because ironing underwear is right up there with drinking coffee to sleep. Let's not go into what we use starch on, now...

Anyway, I was watching "Highlander" (the TV show) while doing it, and I'm confused. I mean, I generally know very little about the show, but having seen Peter Wingfield twice now, I'm not opposed to finding out more. To put it mildly. So, I'm going to appeal to rochefort and miraminx and their expertise in the area. The episode I saw ended with Duncan killing Callus (right?) on top of the Eiffel Tower, and them all going off into the sunset, so did I see the finale of the series? If so, when does Methos first appear? I'm confuuuuuuuuuuuuuused... Help?

And now for something completely different:

I've been writing, and it feels really good. I'm running a good chance of finishing my Fuh-Q-Fest story today. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee... But if not, then soon. The bad part is, it's depressing as all shit, and I think it's causing me to feel depressed myself. I'm torn between feeling accomplished and feeling like drinking myself silly. That's wrong, isn't it?

I'm going to end this silly entry with a letter somebody sent into Time magazine in this week's issue, in response to an article on Bush and the war (I haven't read the article itself, I admit, but I'm guessing it was criticizing his actions):

"Where is a president like Harry Truman when we need him? Truman was willing to drop atom bombs to save the lives of American troops. In the face of enormous public disapproval, he fired General Douglas MacArthur. Truman showed courage and decisiveness when confronted with seemingly impossible situations. The whys and hows of the quagmire in Iraq would not faze him. He would either order the troops home or unleash the full might of the military on those who disrupt our efforts in Iraq. Moreover, he would take full responsibility for the decision."

...or just nuke 'em all. 'Cause, really, what are other people worth if they aren't with us? Like, you know, those Japanese citizens - we couldn't profit from them, they served no purpose, but it showed 'em just how serious we really were about winning.

I understand that war calls for casualties, from all sides. But if you're the sort of person who's willing to drop an A-bomb on millions of innocent people, I sincerely hope you are not in any position to do it. But that's just me.